This day

So things are still looking up. I'm working on a story right now, and it's coming along pretty nice. Today is my brother De'andre's birthday which is kind of a holiday to me. Besides that it's all just moving along. Here's a poem for my bro.

The world spins along and so do we
moving at the speed of sound
being held down by gravity
intense poverty can't hold on
I've been waiting for change for so long
and it's here
so here is to all the tears from the past
and all the love and the laughs
life still carries us on
and now that I look back it never was really all that bad
because of you
the tribe carries on like we do
each one doing are part to spread the knowledge
that comes from the heart
thank life for the chance to dance
this rhythm will go on forever
and so will the love that holds our family together
through the sadness and the madness
the change we waited for
it's always been here
I love you my dear
good luck out there this year
enjoy what comes to you
and whatever you do
know that I'll always be here

The Heroin Monkey's

The heroin monkey's are awake. Pounding on the bathroom door demanding nonsensical things, just like their drug. What a life. Living with Sid Vicious, and Nancy Spungen. The least they could do is make some kick ass punk rock music. But they did make me, which is pretty punk rock now that I think of it.

butt crust

Sometimes I wake up and someone has left but crust on the toilet. And I just can't really grasp, how someone can just let go like that. I mean come on. Washing your ass is like one of life's greatest pleasures. There are so many products that smell good, and smelling good makes you feel good. And you know why not take advantage of it. Since you know the other option is, well just stankassity. I just don't get it. Seeing but crust on the toilet makes me what to vomit. No matter how many times I've seen it, no matter what time of day it is. I want to vomit.

hey

Things seem to be looking up for me. I am moving forward. I just wanted to put the love out into the universe. I feel it, and I appreciate the love. I will have more new, and enjoyable experiences in the the near future. And am enjoying myself now as well. This is boring, but it's true.

Be Positive

I have to think, and manifest with love, and joy. I'm just really going to focus on that. I Know in joy, and positivity no harm can come to me. I know with patients, and faith all my dreams will come true. The universe is conspiring in my favor as I write these words. I will embrace happiness in the face of any adversity. In fact there is no adversity. There is only life, and love at this moment. With pure intention, and focused thought I will seize this moment. I will reach for the light which is never out of reach. I will remember what I have forgotten. I will travel deep within my self and feel my strength. A fight is never necessary. When one taps into the all knowing. Words are my connection with it all. Yet I know at know time can I truly ever be disconnected. There is much love here. I am swimming in the light which never dims. File this under "Bravery through Love".

I t doesn't matter

It's so simple to abandon the one you love
cause it' s too hard
so I suffer and I know this will go on
when one loves they know not what it is
so I'm turning my back on you too
all of you
I suffer because I love
and know not what it is
I have a shaky hand now when I write
what did I really think was going to happen
that you'd take me away from all this
that you'd know the answers to this puzzle
but you are just a kid
and I'm this woman whose heart hurts too much
they're breaking me
but I can still see the sun
I'm running so fast
and the pain still catches up
I just wanted joy
But I don't know what it is
I wonder how long will I live
and will my words survive
will you get me then

Most sleep as I dream with my eyes open. Drowning from the light on the mahines screen. My thoughts travel in many diffrent directions. I have too many questions to list tonight. Today. I'm always hoping for a change. Now I just want some form of stability. And to aquire the tools I need in order to advance my abilities. Silence covers my tounge. Therefore I must run. Farewell.