How My Heart Works

i loved you from the moment I saw you. and was that not a strange moment. fondling you in the sun yet it feeling like some dark hallway. will you remember. will it ever feel the same. strange and secret. I can't study alchemy without you. Now it's time for passports and secrets. You were so private and saw everything. how life is so unfair in it's beauty. I loved you for real in the way strangers love. In the way old writers and anthropologists love. I remember you as a quite genius and carried your artwpork for a life time. Maybe this is a dream. But you changed everthing about my mind. How very much can an angel

touch of your heart.

I never feel like a woman because what is that anyway...

Get this off your chest it says
Maybe it will make sense it says
but what makes sense
my silence and the need to not say anything
my talking too much and saying everything
I am pretty...
I fucking hate being pretty
I hate the word sometimes
gosh you're so pretty
like that is all the world has for me
I know it's not all the world holds for me
there is more and others see it too
I hate staying up all night writing
in honor of the great poets and writers
the ones before me...the one who will see my death
bare witness
I do not believe in anything...which is to say I believe in it all
So many fanatics
I am a fanatic...I am at the mouth of madness
but I used to call it creativity
what is creative about insanity
I am not insane yet I do not feel right
I feel good one moment bad the next
always in the middle and always forgetting to remember
then always remembering to never forget
like a girl on a tightrope but now i am a woman
i do not have to do anything anyone tells me
this is my choice

Random shit my Dad said that still slap today

My Dad on Girls who were not raised by their Father's : "That's why they out there on them poles stripping with all that Aids up off in 'em."

My Dad On 2 Chainz getting robbed: "They done took this Man wallet and both of his chains. big goofy ass nigga."

My Dad on your life: "Sitting up there looking at that Facebook screen with them typewriters on they laps. Dumb motherfuckers think they doing something. Sitting around ain't doing shit."

My Dad on Rick Ross (the rapper): "I can't stand officer Ross or his big ass titties."

My Dad on the state of Hip Hop: "I only listen to 2Pac, Ice Cube, and the Eastsiders. Do you youngsters know about the westcoast?"

My Dad on the resurgence of Nirvana's music: "Dead Dead Dead. They sound dead and they is dead."

My Dad on the new Kanye West album: "You know that nigga hate himself."

My Dad on Father's Day: "It makes me kind of nervous, kind of like Christmas. Let's just watch Frankenstein today."

My dad on current White House Affairs: "Them nigga's ain't never gon't do nothing right. You can forget that."

My Dad on people who talk too much: "Shut the fuck up and step off of this planet."